What is Elimination Communication?
Elimination Communication (also referred to as Natural Infant Hygiene, infant pottying, or diaper-free baby) is about communicating with your baby about their elimination needs now, rather than later. It is a gentle, non-coercive way to meet your baby's natural elimination needs from birth. It allows a baby to follow her instincts not to soil on itself. This practice makes conventional potty training unnecessary by skipping over it entirely. Its important to note that although some call it early potty training or infant potty training, it is not potty training. A baby is never forced or coerced. It is a baby-led practice.
Although EC is almost unheard of in the United States, its commonly practiced in other countries and cultures around the world. It was still practiced in the US just a few generations ago, before the advent of the disposable diaper.
Elimination Communication looks different for each family. It can be done part time, full time,or even occasionally. It can be done diaper free or with diapers as backup. The backup diapers can be disposable diapers or it can be cloth diapers. It can be done over the a small potty, a toilet, a sink, or other receptacle. It can be started as early as birth or at any time after. It can be done using a variety of methods and techniques. The wonderful thing about EC is that it is entirely customizable to each individual family's needs.
Why do people choose to do this?
Elimination Communication saves parents money and time, and has a positive effect on the environment. Its the genuine solution to the ongoing diaper debate by bypassing the question of cloth vs. disposable entirely. It neither creates mountains of trash or mountains of laundry - win, win.
Elimination Communication may also have a positive impact on a babies' digestion, colicky behavior, and diaper rash or yeast issues. Its a natural, healthy practice that serves in protecting your babies' health.
Also, parents that practice EC with their children may notice that their child become potty independent at a very early age. Most EC'ed children will potty learn between 1 and 2 years of age, much earlier than conventional American wisdom tells parents to start looking for "potty readiness" in the conventionally diapered child.
Elimination Communication is often practiced by parents because it is one more way to build on the foundation of trust and bonding, secure attachment, between parent and child. EC nourishes and strengthens the early relationship.
Elimination Communication comes with its perks of avoiding diapers, saving money, helping the environment, but ultimately its about responding and recognizing that your baby has elimination needs. Babies are born with the ability to control and be aware of their eliminations. Babies who are consistently in diapers are not as comfortable or hygienic, maintain less awareness of body functions, and must relearn to not to use their clothing as a toilet in the potty training years, which requires significantly more, and potentially unpleasant, effort on both the part of the parent and child later on.
If given the choice, babies from birth will choose not to eliminate on themselves.
To learn more about the benefits of practicing Elimination Communication, check out:http://ecsimplified.com/ec-benefits/
How is it done?
Elimination Communication can be done in a variety of ways:
timing, baby's signals, intuition, and cueing.
You can use just one , two, or all four. Whichever method or combination of methods you use, it's entirely up to you!
Timing - There are certain times of the day a baby will be more likely to eliminate:First waking up, frequently in the recent hours after waking, after nursing, after being in a baby carrier, stroller, carseat, baby equipment, and before bed. Some people do EC entirely on timing, by getting to know their child's potty routine and offering the potty at appropriate times.
Baby's signals - A baby will often provide signals from birth. If responded to, they typically keep signaling their elimination needs. Some conventionally diapered children will stop signaling if their elimination needs are ignored, so starting later with an older baby may be more difficult if their cues are no longer present. Some common infant signals include refusing to nurse, fussing at the breast, suddenly becoming still or getting active during a calm period, crying, brow furrowing, etc. Each baby is different and will signal differently.
Intuition - Listening to and trusting your intuition is an important, intriguing part of parenting. With a little time and practice, it can also become a very reliable tool for anticipating when your baby may need to eliminate. Describing what intuition is and how it works is difficult, but there are a few common ways your intuition speaks to you: a sudden thought, wonder, or question that or if your baby needs to go; seeing, hearing, or smelling urine or feces; sudden wet feeling while baby is in your lap but dry; hearing the cue sound, or simply "just knowing".
Cueing - Cueing is the part in which you get to communicate back with your baby. Once you listen to your baby's signals and offer the potty, you may begin of using a specific sound or action to signal that its time to go. Babies are often held in a special EC position in which they are in a squatting type position to make eliminations more comfortable and easier for baby. Babies can be held over the potty or placed on a potty, and then given a auditory cue such as "Psssss". Auditory cues are entirely up to each family.
Learn More:
Diaper Free: The Gentle Wisdom of Natural Infant Hygiene by Ingrid Bauer
The Diaper-Free Baby: The Natural Toilet Training Alternative by Christine Gross-Loh
Getting Started with EC:
OUR EC JOURNEY
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| EC in Infant Hold over the Baby Bjorn potty at 3 weeks old. |
The Learning Curve
We started our journey when she was just 5 Days old; we caught the first ever pee in the Baby Bjorn Potty. We were overjoyed, and ecstatic to see such a young baby capable of such. We caught a couple more over the next day or so. But the next week, I tried and tried, and I couldn't catch one. I was baffled. How do these women in non-diapering cultures catch every single pee? Why am I so bad at this? Being a perfectionist and a first time mother, I was overwhelmed and discouraged. I kept trying a few more days, but wasn't catching but one or two pees, and was beginning to focus too much on counting the catches and misses, which was making me feel like a failure. I had to learn to let go of my former expectations and accept the journey, wherever it went. So, I gave myself a break and just started to watch my baby. We did a lot of diaper free time on a large, square waterproof mat on the living room floor. So that's what her pee face looks like! Oh, she does that before she poops. She pees at this time everyday. She almost always goes poo at this time of the day. I think she needs to pee now/ I think she just peed, yep! By two weeks old, we were off and running again on our EC journey, focusing on watching her cues, offering potty opportunities at more appropriate times, and learning to listen to my intuition.
FAQ: How does this work in the winter time when you its too cold to do Diaper Free time? Seems like a lot of work to have to continuously remove their clothing to offer the potty.A: Many people that practice Elimination Communication use baby leggings for ease of pottying. You only have to remove their diaper, instead of removing and dressing your child in pants all the time. There are special pants either sewn to be crotchless or to have a detachable flap that can be purchased from stores. These neat EC clothing options get pricey, so we bought some baby thigh high socks (pictured to the right) from the EC Store / Rock-a-Thigh Baby and relied heavily on those.
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| Daddy pottying her over the sink in classic EC position. Maybellee loves looking at herself and Daddy in the mirror, so if she's fussing on the infant potty but we know she's got to go, we try this next before we give up. It usually does the trick! |
ECing at Home
My go to potty receptacle is the Baby Bjorn Infant Potty (pictured above). Its whats easiest and most comfortable for me since I can sit comfortably and hold her over for as long as she needs. The Baby Bjorn potty stays close by in the living room at all times. Having it in the living room makes it always present in our minds to watch for her signals. I noticed that if it was put away or left in the restroom, I was more apt to be a little lazy and not take her. Once she potties, the Baby Bjorn has the seat insert that we can remove and take to the restroom to clean up quickly. When she was really small and newborn, and still sometimes before bed, Daddy still will hold her over the sink in the classic EC position (pictured to the right). We keep a bleach water bottle near by for sink clean ups. Daddy often uses running water to cue her when he practices EC this way, instead of the "Pssss" sound.
Maybellee and I have some really great EC days where she may only use 1 or 2 diapers the entire day. Other days, I may miss all her cues and she'll use 8 diapers that day. There are some days, I have to give myself a break and just not worry about making the catches. Other days, I have a lot more motivation and energy to give to EC. On average, we catch between 50 and 75% of all her pees. One of my most favorite parts of ECing: we catch about 99% of all poops since she was 4 weeks old.
Nighttime EC
It was about 6 weeks old I finally felt confident enough to try ECing at night. I was up at night to nurse and change her diaper anyway, so I began offering the potty. We also had chosen to co-sleep, which aided in our nighttime EC. We purchased another BabyBjorn potty to keep upstairs in the night. I would swing my legs off the bed, remove the potty insert, place it between my legs and hold baby over it. Another popular nighttime potty is the top hat potty (pictured to the right). Nighttime EC was difficult at first. I was tired. She was tired. Neither of us wanted to be awake. Eventually, we figured out a good routine. It took time and patience. If she would start to stir, I'd get up quickly and put her on the potty that was next to the bed. She'd potty, then we'd nurse right back to sleep. Soon, I found nighttime EC easier than daytime EC simply because her cue to potty was very simple: she would stir in her sleep or wake up. We didn't have any nighttime misses after 8 weeks old. At first, we were up sometimes three times a night doing this routine. By three months old, we were up just once in the night. We were also confident enough to even give Diaper Free at nighttime a try for a couple weeks; however, having a diaper on as backup gives me peace of mind. At five months old, she began holding her bladder all night long until the morning. It especially makes me feel accomplished and proud of the commitment I made to nighttime EC. I never have to worry about doing any nighttime potty training later on or the worry of having a child still wetting the bed at 4 or 5 years old, because she is already nighttime potty learned.
ECing While Out and About
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| Being held over the big potty. This is how we pottied her at family's houses and while out of our own home. |
When we are at others' houses, we simply take her to the bathroom and hold her over the big toilet and cue her. When at restaurants, the same thing. We actually didn't start ECing on the go until about 3 months old, and by that time she was able to hold it for longer durations, so we almost always make it to the bathroom in time. Parents that take their EC babies on long car trips or that EC on the go from the very beginning often keep a travel potty in their car. Popular travel potties include the top hat potty or the Potette potty on the go, which comes with disposable liners and can be used on the ground or even used as a toilet seat reducer.
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| Potette On the Go Potty |
Because the majority of babies are the most metabolically active in the morning, we typically try to arrange that we don't leave to do errands or shopping until after 10 am, after she does all her morning pees at home. However, we've managed to EC even while out and about during the mornings. We've successfully ECed at church. It did mean that we had to make three trips to the bathrooms, (when we arrived, during the middle of worship, and during the middle of service), but it wasn't any more work than if we had to go to the restrooms to change her diaper each time she soiled it.
Potty Pauses HappenMaybellee started her first potty pause when she started to roll over at 3 months old. Then again when she started to sit up at 4 months old, and yet another when she started to crawl at 5 months old. Each potty pause was different, sometimes only lasting a day or two or sometimes a week. Sometimes it was only during certain times of the day she would consistently refuse.
FAQ: What do you do about a potty pause?
A: Potty pauses happen and can be very frustrating. At this time, its important to remember that EC is baby - led. A baby should never be forced to stay on the potty. It should always be a positive experience. Keep watching for signals and keep offering the potty, but respect your baby's wishes if they signal "No".
When she was learning to roll over and sit up and experienced our first few potty pauses, I allowed her diaper free time on a waterproof mat and she eliminated there. At 3 months old, I noticed she also was seeming "bored"on the potty. I encouraged her to stay on the potty by bringing the toys with us to the potty and allowing her to play with them. It helped her boredom and meant few potty refusals.
Now that I have a crawling baby, diaper free time is nearly non existent during our potty pauses. By 4 months old, I started noticing refusals, often with an arched back, looking back at me. As pictured previously, I always sat in back, holding her on the potty facing forward. It took me awhile, but finally when she was 5 months old, I had an "Ah-ha!" moment. She wanted to be facing me! We turned the potty around and held her on facing us, and suddenly potty refusals decreased.
During potty pauses when I can't encourage her to sit on the potty, I make sure to still watch closely and change her immediately as soon as she wets, so she stays aware of her eliminations despite being in a diaper. Although potty pauses can be frustrating (especially for a momma like me that hates washing diapers!), I accepted them and just gave myself a break to enjoy watching her new milestones, knowing that it wouldn't be long until she's choosing the potty once more.
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| Trying to put herself on her potty by herself at 5 months old. |
Potty Learning Progress
At 5 months old, I got to see my hard work pay off during one of the longest potty pauses yet! She crawled over to her potty and tried to climb up on it. I didn't think anything of it at first because I thought she was just playing and exploring, but then it dawned on me...
Could she be? I rushed over, put her on it, and she immediately peed! It was so exciting to watch her try to potty herself. It took me a few minutes to realize it wasn't just a coincidence. In the following days, it kept happening. Yippee!!! It was thrilling because It was yet another obvious signal from her. Our Elimination Communication suddenly got much more simplified. She crawls the to potty, I place her on it. How much easier can it get!? Well, just as soon as it was getting easy, I finally thought it was getting to the time to transition to the big potty.
Big Potty Transition
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| Happy Girl on the Big Potty using the seat reducer! |
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| My sister ECing my youngest Nephew on the Big Potty right from the start. |
Family Support & Working Outside of the Home
I've been blessed with a super supportive family and friends that not only supports my EC decision, but actively tries to help and make "catches" too. Daddy helps a lot when he's home. I've been blessed to be able to stay home with her most of the time, but I do work occasionally. Usually its in the evening when Daddy can be home to EC her, but I do work some days as well. Grammy is usually able to watch her when I work days and helps out when she babysits. She also keeps an Infant Potty at her house. Other family and even a close friend that has watched her have been very accommodating to give it a try as well. Daddy, Grammy, family and friends have been an active part in helping us through the EC journey, for which I'm grateful and definitely gives me more peace of mind when I do have to leave my baby to go into work.
FAQ: I am a working parent. Can I still do this?
A: I often get asked this and the answer is: Absolutely! My sister ECed her second while being a full time working mom. Her children were diapered during the day at the babysitters' and were ECed part time in the evenings and weekends. Even being part time ECed, they were able to communicate their needs, and both boys were potty learned at an early age. Many people that practice EC, some even stay at home moms, only do it part time. I myself sometimes take part-time days! Your EC Journey is your own and there is no one right way to do it!
Community's Reaction
Not everyone I've come across thinks its a good idea. Despite the first few nervous times I pottied her while out and about, I've never been too shy about it. If she needs to potty, I excuse us to the restroom. If people ask me what I'm doing, I tell them. I love our Elimination Communication Journey and wish to share it with others. Some people will react very negatively or even rudely about elimination communication. Some even go as far as calling it abusive. When this happens, I remember especially in the last generation that everyone was told it was harmful and bad to potty train before 3, let alone put a baby on the potty. America has been a conventionally diapering culture for so long that its hard for people to grasp the idea that babies can do this. I don't take it personally and do my best to try and offer education so that they may understand its not only natural but healthy! Fortunately, for every one person that balks at the idea, two people find it very impressive and fascinating.
If you lack a good support system, there are large communities and support groups on Facebook and elsewhere on the internet. I purposefully sought out and made friends via the internet so that I had a strong support system.
It's Not About the Destination,
It's About the Journey
Elimination Communication has a learning curve. It takes time to learn and
to get to know your baby, but if you take the time, it creates a deep, fascinating connection between parent and baby. EC is not a linear path to a certain
destination. Its a journey, ebbing and flowing, curving this way and
that way, going up and down. Its not about the catches or the misses; its always about communicating with your baby. Just as dynamic as your ever growing baby, so is the
elimination communication journey. No two EC days are the same; they are
always changing. This journey has had its challenges, but its worthwhile. I encourage everyone to give it a try!
One of my most favorite quotes: “Elimination is a journey, and every parent and baby will
experience it differently. There is no right way to do it, and you
cant get it wrong! Be gentle with yourself, and don't judge your
process. Every small effort you make at communicating benefits you
and your child.” (168) ~Diaper Free
Update: 6 months to EC Graduation
From 6-9 months, our EC journey continued as usual. At around 9 months, we hit our largest potty pause yet, because she started walking! She was much too busy and I also became much busier with work, gardening, and caring for our first foster child placement. She was mostly in diapers at this time, but we still nighttime ECed as usual and would catch a potty before bed and every morning pee and poo, even if we didn't make a single catch the rest of the day.
Shortly after her first birthday we were surprised with the news that we were expecting again, which put our EC journey on hold some more as I dealt with first trimester fatigue and all-day sickness. Finally when she was 15 months, I found some second trimester energy and motivation to get her graduated to potty independence before the new baby arrived. Unfortunately she had a newfound sense of independence and didn't want to be told or made to use the potty. We were struggling a lot with tantrums and power struggles; she was developing a very strong personality and will. The potty became a fight as well. She was able to pull off diapers now and would mess on the floors. It was happening several times a day. Although elimination communication is baby-led, I felt I was at a point where she needed to start learning boundaries regarding her bodily functions. I was tired of cleaning pee and poo off my carpets! For several months, we had many stand offs in the bathroom waiting for her to use the potty. She could not climb off the big potty so I would sit her on and wait it out, however long the tantrum took until she would finally choose to potty. I only ever enforced the new boundaries when I was absolutely sure she had to potty - after meal times and snacks. Thankfully, her morning or nightime pees never became a struggle. After a few months she finally started to stop battling over the potty and I was entering third trimester with a new bout of fatigue, so again I took a break. We maintained the easy morning and nighttime potty routines as always. When she turned 18 months the following month, I felt a new sense of urgency to get her out of diapers. I ditched the diapers to see what may happen. We had always kept an infant potty easy accessible in living room and both bathrooms. I did have to clean up some messes, but before 19 months, she was taking herself to the potty every single time - just as long as she was bottomless. At 20 months with new baby's due date a few weeks away I gave underwear a try but she wet them every time. At 21 months as long as she's bare bottomed under a dress with an easily accessible potty, she is 99.9 percent reliable. She still wears a diaper when we go away from the house but as long as we remember to take her to the potty she rarely uses her diaper.
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